So This is What Love Is...

This Valentine's Day may turn out to be one of the sweetest I have ever experienced.

If all goes well, twins Elikem and Selikem (age 2) from Ghana, Africa, will board a plane in Accra and travel with a family friend to the bitter cold temperatures and twenty inches of snow in Columbus, Ohio. They will be here for one purpose, to finally be united with their family around the bedside of their dying 4 year old brother, currently being cared for in Children's Hospital.

Looking back two months ago, I had no idea the impact that this little family would have on my life. Back in November, I was immersed in the details of two other family friends that were also spending much time in Children's Hospital. Sophia Hope, who turned 2 just yesterday, has been battling leukemia since she was 9 months old. Another cancer fighter joined the place in August of this year, 17 year old Paula Winkler. She was anticipating a missions trip to Brazil with her family and unexpectedly found herself in the hospital beginning months of chemotherapy, also for leukemia. It was tragedy and hope that brought all these families together. Somehow, my family still healthy and intact, was blessed immeasurably as I became a part of all their lives.

Bernice and Charles Ayivor were also going about their normal lives in Accra, Ghana in the month of July. Their four year old son, Kekelia, came home from his last day of school with an unexpected and unusual problem; he was having trouble walking. Soon, his speech began to slur and his parents hearts began to sink. What could possibly be wrong with their active, vivacious little boy? No one could have anticipated what the next three months would hold for this young family. Keke would be admitted to a hospital in Accra with the diagnosis of a brain tumor. During the days, Bernice, now several months pregnant with their four child, would stay by his bedside as he suffered the effects of the tumor. For three months, she barely saw her then 18 month old twins. During the night, Charles would stay by his bedside in a modest, blue chair, often catching only a few minutes of sleep as he would lay his head on the foot of his son's bed. Keke shared a room with many patients, and so quiet and sleep was hard to come by.

Bernice's Father resides in Columbus, Ohio and works for O.S.U. Perhaps a Doctor in Children's Hospital would have the skills and necessary facility to help cure Keke? The little family made the agonizing decision of sending Bernice, Keke and his Dr. (who would return to Ghana immediately after the flight) in the hopes of finding a cure. Bernice, now less than two months from her due date with her new baby, would find the strength to stay at her son's bedside, and her beloved husband Charles, would continue to work as he could and care for their twins, or "tweenies", as they are lovingly called. The family was separated by an entire ocean - but did it all for the love they had for their Kekelia. Hope was high that a surgery could be performed, Keke recover, and Bernice fly home with him before the new Ayivor came.

Hope turned into saddness, as this young boy was placed in hospice care at Children's almost immediately. There was no surgery, no procedure, nothing that the Doctors here in the states could offer the heart broken family. From Oct. 31 until Dec. 14th, Bernice, and her father, hoped for the best at Keke's bedside. On Dec. 14th, little Klenam Ayivor made his entrance into this world - far from his natural homeland and his father, and twin siblings. Back home, visa's were applied for - by Charles and the twins. Charles arrived in Port Columbus on Christmas Day. He came and faced instant joy and sorrow as he met his newborn son for the first time, only minutes later to be at the bedside of his beloved and terminally ill son.

During those difficult days at Children's, Bernice found comfort and friendship with another family - Paula Winkler's family. It wasn't long before Tammy had placed Bernice's story on her caringbridge website - so other people could pray for these brothers and sisters in Christ that were so far from their home. And that is where I came in...first to correspond with Bernice via e-mail, then phone calls, and finally with a hug as we met for the first time. We marveled at how hope and tragedy came together to intertwine new friendships and bonds that will most likely, last a lifetime.

I have kept every message and e-mail from Bernice and Charles because I never want to forget this family, even when they return to their warm home in Accra. Our hearts have become bonded together first and formost, through our shared faith in Christ. I have been inspired by their strength and absolute refusal to complain, even though it seems they have a reason or two to do so at this time. They have shared their faith, their lives, their testimony and their hopes with us. We have typically had lunch together at the Ronald McDonald house on Fridays as I bring "Panda Express" in for all of us to enjoy. We've laughed over the cultural differences. (One day in November, very seriously, Bernice asked Tammy and I: "I must ask you a question: How long does this Winter last?" Tammy and I hated to break the news to her that our cold winter months were just beginning! I hadn't thought about the fact that they were unaccustomed to cold temperatures, let alone 20 inches of snow on the ground.) We've also become "facebook friends", and through that avenue, I've introduced her to many of my friends. Tammy has orchestrated a Baby Shower to be held for baby Klenam (recently rescheduled because of the inclement Ohio weather). We have come very close to crying together as we have pondered the outcome for Keke, if God does not choose to heal him. We have shared our mother's hearts and I have grown to love this beautiful woman as if I've known her my whole life. I am amazed at how quickly women, living lives thousands of miles apart, can have so much in common. On our last trip in, I gave her a turquise necklace and matching ear rings to remember me by when she returns home.

Today, a new crisis has arisen. 911 was called for Bernice yesterday to transport her to Grant Hospital, where she called me from today. Her rheumatism became so severe that the pain was out of control. I am praying that she is resting peacefully tonight, and that Charles is able to care for his newborn son with so many other responsibilities pressing on him.

In all of this, they have never complained. Charles said something like this: "I would have never chosen this trial for my family, but had it not occured, I would never have known the provision and kindness of God in our dire situation". It has been joyful to observe the body of Christ come together to help care for their physical and financial needs. It has been inspiring to observe the outstanding care that Keke is receiving at Children's Hospital. It has been heart warming to visit them at the Volunteer run McDonald Home, which has been their wonderful home, away from home.

As Charles and Bernice face their uncertain future here in the States, I can only imagine what must be running through their minds, especially in the middle of the night when they cannot sleep. Will their jobs still be there when they return? Bernice, an expert in three languages, has a job with the Government. Charles is a gifted artisian that creates and makes beautiful, custom leather sandles and shoes. We were delighted to see pictures of at least 50 of his creations! Months ago, he was employing eight workers as he ran one of the three custom shoe shops in Accra. He is now down to one employee. Hope is placed in God to help them daily, to provide for their physical and financial needs here, and that someday their life will be restored to some assemblence of normal once they return to their home in Africa. Everytime I am with them, our conversation always returns to their gratefulness - to God, to this kind country and to the body of Christ here in Central Ohio. I will never look at my "difficult" circumstances the same.

Just this past week, many of us were on the phone trying to make an appeal concerning a problem with the twins visa being denied (a long story - so thankful to report it was finally resolved). Resuming my normal school activities last Tuesday, I was reviewing some of the Ohio facts for my daughter. I came across our state motto: "With God, All things are possible". I wrote to Bernice that night and told her of our state motto, and my firm belief that she and her family were temporary Ohioians for a purpose. As I read her reply via e-mail that night, I could hear her beautiful African accent as she proclaimed: "I love it! Yes, we KNOW that with God, ALL things are possible."

Perhaps on Valentines Day this year, we'll see with our own eyes the reuniting of a family seperated by miles, but never by love.